Steemlock Sprite and the Mystery of the Onche

You: are you french?
Stranger: yes
You: what does onche mean?
Stranger: onche?
You: yeah.
Stranger: doesn't mean anything...
You: me and another person encountered a french guy on omegle, who kept saying 'onche'
You: we googled for it on google.fr and there were lots of results but we couldn't figure out what it means
You: can you help?
Stranger: i'm really sorry i try to figure out what it can be... but... :(
Stranger: maybe a word from the argot language you know
You: maybe it's a regional word?
Stranger: yes, maybe. i'm from the north
You: i'll try to find a southerner
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Stranger: Hello
You: are you from southern france?
Stranger: yes...exactly.....howd you know that?
You: ...really?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: totally
Stranger: I'm amazed
You: i know it's a long shot but i'm trying to find a french southerner to settle a semantic dispute.
You: i'm trying to find out what onche means.
Stranger: onche is not a french word
You: i know
You: i'm guessing it's southern slang
Stranger: I see many people saying it here but I don't know what it means
Stranger: well not in my region then
You: and i asked a guy from northern france and he didn't know
Stranger: well
Stranger: that must be in a dialect only spoken by peasants
Stranger: dirty country boys
You: french peasants on omegle? O_o
Stranger: there are many like this where I live and I never understand what they say
Stranger: french peasants are everywhere you don't want them
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You: hi, are you french?
Stranger: hi
Stranger: ouais t'es du 18-25 ?
You: wait.
You: what does 'onche' mean?
Stranger: ^^
You: i asked two french guys and they didn't know. so please say you do.
Stranger: and you talked to a french ?
Stranger: what did he said exactly ?
You: me and another omegle-person had encounters with french people saying onche.
You: well, it's like
You: guy: ONCHE
You: me: what?
You: guy: do you know onche?
You: me: what does it mean?
You: ...and i think he disconnected
Stranger: -.-
Stranger: in fact it doesn't mean anything
Stranger: it's a stupid joke from a stupid french forum
You: oooh
You: what joke? what forum?
You: so it is a meme.
You: i was guessing it's a meme.
Stranger: "we" use it in "ONCHE ONCHE KOM C DROLE"
Stranger: for laughiing at someone
You: like.. oink oink? :P
Stranger: dunno ^^
You: and does 'kom c' mean anything?
Stranger: yeah it's "comme c'est"
Stranger: but spelling for stupid people
You: oh

Weight consciousness (I hate your fat cock)

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Stranger: dutch?
You: no
You: :)
Stranger: hha, okee:D
You: will you continue your journey to find your fated Dutch person?
Stranger: FATED?
Stranger: im not fat at all.
Stranger: h**
Stranger: do you understand?
Stranger: ore not?
Stranger: bye bye
Stranger: ik haat je dikke piemel.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Knock knock

Stranger: knock knock

You: who's there?

Stranger: hell if i know

You: hell if i know who?

Stranger: im not that good in english to make jokes

The guessing game

You: i'm thinking of something yellow with pink dots

Stranger: If i told you, I did before, told you how I used to be, would you disconnect on me?

You: what is it?

Stranger: My underwear.

You: you guessed

You: no fair

You: you must be cheating

Stranger: Probably.

American English or Brittish English? Two completely diferent languages

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

You: yo

Stranger: Hiho

You: how's it going?

Stranger: ehem :D can you speak english please ?:)

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Bloodninja/Sir Schmoopy crossover

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

You: hey

Stranger: fuuck me?

You: are you a hot girl?

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: please fuck me

You: sure, let me get my robe and wizard hat

You: i cast flare

Stranger: ...STOP IMITATING BLOODNINJA

You: lawl

You: so you know about him

Stranger: YES

Stranger: AND I AM THE ONE TRYING TO IMMITATE HIM HERE

Stranger: <.<

You: well, good luck

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

My echo likes cheese... a lot

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

You: echo?

Stranger: echo

You: eeeechooooo!

Stranger: I LIKE CHEESEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe

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Comparing

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: hi

Stranger: m?

You: mmmaybe

Stranger: 16m

You: 16km

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So lonely to be so smart

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: hea

You: hello

Stranger: asl?

You: iq?

Stranger: iq?

You: asl?

Stranger: 16/f/U.S.

Stranger: you?

You: 132

Stranger: your 132!?

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Prince Albert in a can

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: sir i have the coolest president in the world.

You: have you sir?

Stranger: have i what

You: would you say he is cooler than a cucumber?

Stranger: yess

Stranger: much cooler

You: oh golly sir! that is cool indeed

Stranger: oh how splendid

Stranger: u british chap?

You: no good sit m'afraid i'm not

You: and i did mean sir of course

Stranger: well im not a sir

You: are you a madam?

Stranger: yes

You: or a lady?

You: a chap?

You: a fellow?

You: oh how delightful

Stranger: good sense of humor u have

Stranger: ever met the queen of england?

You: can't say i have

Stranger: well i have

Stranger: some even say

Stranger: i look like her

You: i would think a queen looks at things as normal people

Stranger: where do u hail from?

You: i hail from where my home is

You: and my home is where i am

Stranger: very nice

Stranger: very nice

Stranger: indeed

Stranger: im at work

Stranger: i should be working

Stranger: but i gave myslef a mini break

You: ah, good, all work and no play

Stranger: listen stranger

Stranger: dont get hostile with me

You: yes mam

Stranger: madam to u

You: yes madam sir!

Stranger: why, ur a little on the crazy side

Stranger: arent u

You: why thank you kindly

Stranger: u bored bro...

You: quite positively bored to the bone

Stranger: i have to go

Stranger: my boss just saw me

You: take care and have a smashing day

Stranger: um in deep shit

Stranger: u too

Stranger: lol

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

This had to happen, obviously

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: asl ?

You: A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

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Complicated words

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Stranger: hey

Stranger: asl?

You: what do you want?

Stranger: nothing

Stranger: i want to know how old you are and where you're from

Stranger: and if ur a girl or a guy

You: k, so

You: if i say 20 f australia

You: what happens next?

Stranger: I will ask you for a pic of yourself

Stranger: so i can masturbate all night

You: you're a pervert

Stranger: ture

Stranger: true*

Stranger: does it matter?

You: not really

You: but i could recommend some sites

You: rather than you freaking out girls on the internet

Stranger: xD

Stranger: Im just kiddin ^^

Stranger: im only bored

You: i'm sure you are

You: just kidding

Stranger: im only here to practice my english so i only write random things

You: yes, the old excuse, i'm practicing my english, so i only told i want to masturbate to pics of you because there are complicated words in it

Stranger: exactly

You: makes sense

Stranger: masturbation is a difficult word for me

You: i can tell you a harder one

You: icosahedron

Stranger: i dont like math

Stranger: i only like sex

You: i don't like people who like sex more than math

You: sorry

Stranger: ur quite boring

Stranger: guess where im from

You: turkey

You: ?

Stranger: nope

Stranger: northern europe

You: hmm

You: russia

Stranger: nope Sweden

Stranger: im 18 but very immature

You: that's nothing to pride yourself with

Stranger: whatever

Stranger: i gotta go

Stranger: come visit me someday

Stranger: bye

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Silvence

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You:

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The battle but not the war

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Stranger: I'M THE KING OF THE CAPS LOCK

You: I'M THE DOUBLE KING OF CAPS LOCK

You: I WIN!

You: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Stranger: NOOOOOOOOOOOO

You: YOU'RE NOTHING BUT AN UNDER-KING

You: I SHOULD THROW YOU IN THE DUNGEON!

Stranger: NEVER! I WILL ALWAYS BE THE KING !

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Third son of odin

Stranger: could you tell me your asl

You: yes!

You: i come from valhalla, the third son of odin, born before the stars and among the stars

You: I am power and I am strenght

Stranger: i should say you don't need to tell lie

You: the third son of odin, ye who is wiser and stronger than any mortal man, who can slay titans without so much as a sweat does not tell lies

Stranger: 你是神经病吗

You: "You are right Neurology"?

Stranger: 什么？

You: 我的第三个儿子的奥丁

Stranger: your english is good

You: the third son of odin speaks all languages of man

Stranger: i feel you are so strange

You: there is nothing strange in ultimate power over both man and beast

Stranger: you want to go to die

You: only in the day of days which shall bring forth the end of the world will the gods of valhalla find their death

Stranger: can you explain it in chinese

You: 仅在一天之内带来世界末日将神的瓦尔哈拉找到其死亡

Stranger: so deep

Stranger: is it poem

You: tis only the truth beyond all knowledge

Note from you: no idea what any of the chinese means, but apparently it means something. Also I don't know who the third son of odin is and what he does.

Power of my sword

You: Lord of battle I pray on bended knee conquest by the rising sun

You: Ill wait for thy command with flame and blood at hand

You: Glory and a broken sword.

Stranger: You have my blessig, oh mighty warrior

Asian

You: yo

You: i'm asian

Stranger: Hi

Stranger: Where's?

You: in america north of texas

Stranger: Really?

You: small state you can't miss it

You: course

You: where you from?

Stranger: Taiwan

The shadowbane effect

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Stranger: hi

You: yo

Stranger: im asian

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Funny named mobsters part 2

Stranger: hi

You: hello stranger

You: long time no see

You: have you seen jimmy here lately?

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: just ran away from the left side to right

You: which way did he go he owes me 5 big ones

Stranger: right side

Stranger: if you go faster you can catch hi

Stranger: him

Stranger: he broke his legs so he can't run fast

You: thanks bro if fat marten gets me before i get the 5 big ones i'll be in trouble

You: and you don't want to be in trouble with fat marten

Stranger: yeah i know

You: remember slim george?

Stranger: he will kick your ass

Stranger: ah ,that boy

You: man that was nasty bro

Stranger: i havent seen him for such a long time

You: you won't either

You: marten's goons got him

You: prickly alice and heins the feather

You: they did him in good

Stranger: ah poor him

Stranger: so whats he doing now?

Stranger: is he really dead or just fucked

You: sleeping with the fishes prolly

You: the dry fish gang that is

You: in the big house

Stranger: ah..

You: reminds me of wise sam, he met the dry fish gang once

You: they fished him good

You: rotten trout, smelly carp

You: the works

Stranger: yeah man

Stranger: really

Stranger: i wanna get out of these things

Stranger: i wanna have a normal life

Stranger: thats because why i am runned away

You: once you're in you can't get out bro

You: believe me i tried

You: they always find you

You: no safehouse is too safe for fat marten

Stranger: ah.. bad

Stranger: but i know a guy named, lester.. he is having a normal life as i heard

You: you mean normal lester?

You: wicked mary's brother?

You: he was never really in

You: not like us bro

Stranger: ah.. i will fuck myself.. how i could get into like this..

You: been asking myself the same question bro

Stranger: whatever.. what are you doing on these days?

You: you know on the run

You: trying to keep a low profile

Stranger: yeah.. same things. about the drugs? how is the thing? best quality?

You: naw man you confuse me with slippery mark

You: he's with those i deal in pens

You: high quality only

Stranger: ah good.. how can i get that? and the money,you know.. i always in trouble with the money

You: i can make you a deal on this swiss pen bro

You: only 50 big ones

Stranger: ah okay. but wait for a month then.. i am on a big job, and i will get 250 big ones at least

You: 250 big ones bro? that's a sweet deal can i get in on it?

Stranger: it must a secret i didn't suppose to tell you

Stranger: but i will try for you man

Stranger: for the things you have done for me

You: thanks bro

You: i'll let you keep half

Stranger: ah okay. let me talk to the big candy

Funny named mobsters

Stranger: haay

You: yo wassup bro

Stranger: nadaaa u?

You: did you see charlie round here

You: he owes me 5 big ones

Stranger: no sorry havnt seen him in a while..

Stranger: u low on the spondoolas?

Stranger: i can lend you?

You: naw brother i don't take money from close friends

Stranger: is ok.

You: in that case can you make it 50 big ones instead?

You: i gotta pay off george and his boys

Stranger: i sure can budddyyy

Stranger: oh shit. i dont want georgy porgy on my case

You: dude i hear he's already after you bro

Stranger: nooo waaay

You: him and alice's goons

Stranger: im guna lay low for a while.

Stranger: man now i feel like a shmuck.

You: ah you're a coward

Stranger: i hear there in cahoots with fat larry..

You: remember ben? he could take them all on himself

Stranger: i aint messing with no fat larry

Stranger: ah ben was a good man..

You: too bad fat larry did him in and ate him

You: that's why they call him fat now

You: before he was skinny larry

You: i remember those days

Stranger: them were the daays.. folks like us were safe to roam the streets

You: now they're on the streets the roofs even the sewers

You: the sewers bro

Stranger: eyes and ears everywhere.

Stranger: no where is safe...

Stranger: quit calling me bro.. ur making me feel like a man

You: what's the bmatter bro? last time i checked you were a man

You: popular with the ladies and everything

Stranger: correct me if im wrong, but i dont think you checked buddyy

You: true that bro

Stranger: thats right. BUDDDY

You: hold on someone's at the door

Stranger: ding a ling a ling

Stranger: is it my pizza/

You: you! this is fat larry

You: we got your buddy and we got him good

Stranger: ohhh shitt... better skidaddle

Stranger: :O

Stranger: no

Stranger: not big martin

You: big marting's history

Stranger: NOOOOO

You: we're gonna come after you next

You: remember what happend to slow fred?

Stranger: ul never find mee

Stranger: NEVEERRR

You: same thing's gonna hapen to you

You: and i don't mean ripping your pants at the company picnic

Stranger: they wont let u get away with this you GOON

You: they? nobody has your back

Stranger: im a stealthy as a train in the night

You: i'm fat larry i own half the town

You: the other half is not worth owning

Stranger: i have a masked vigilante on my side

Stranger: you dont wana messs with me, lady

You: sandwitch grirl?

You: or meatpack man

Stranger: worse.

Stranger: BAGEL BABE

Stranger: your worst nightmare.

You: you didn't read the papers today then

Stranger: why is that.

You: bagel babe chomped by fat larry

You: those were the headlines

Stranger: oh heeeellls no

Stranger: im bamboozled.

You: you're alone and we know where

You: so you'd better pay up before we find you

Stranger: its only a matter of time and il be gone again

Stranger: GONE BABY GONE

You: but you can't cause then we'd find you

You: it's only a matter of time till fat larry has his desert

You: and you'd look mighty fine with a cherry on your head

Stranger: ima thinking of a plan

Stranger: bingo.

Stranger: you;ll never get me now ya chump

You: no i can't believe you've foiled me so easy

Stranger: you better believe it bucko!

You: i'll have to go on a diet now or i'll lose all street cred with the buys

You: they'll call me skinny larry again and it'll be your fault

Stranger: i hear the zone is all the rage

You: you'll remember the name fat larry mark my words

Stranger: your words are marked.

Stranger: ohhh there marked with a big fat marker.

You: permanent?

You: cause that's the only way fat larry likes it

Stranger: etched all over every desk in the city

You: and so i tricked you into doing my work at last

Actions

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You: *i say something first*

You: *i say hello and ask the stranger about his or her day*

Stranger: hi, good u?

You: *i come up with a lie to not tip off the stranger of my true intentions, location or past activities*

Stranger: what are your true intentions? lol

You: *i believe the stranger is on to me, I start assimilating his or her brain*

Stranger: haha ok i'm confused

You: *i take advantage of the confusion to implant microdroids behind the stranger's eyes to ease the process of mindcontrol*

You: *i laugh behind my screen as the stranger is clueless about what happened*

Stranger: whoa lol

You: *I'm surprised the stranger is not fully under my control but attempt to hide it and I ask him or her how he or she feels*

Stranger: i feel good u?

You: *i'm secretly feeling my way trough the stranger's memories but reply that i'm feeling well*

Stranger: what do you see?

You: *i confess that I removed my eyes back in the fifth war of shadows and ate them due to starvation and can only see trough my victim's eyes*

You: *i add that it's never anything interesting*

Stranger: my past is very interesting

You: *i know that is a lie, the most interesting thing i found was breakfast*

You: *i however say that i agree*

Stranger: hmm maybe you really didn't see my memories

You: *i am pleased that the mind control is starting to kick in and smile*

You: *i do not alert the stranger to this fact*

You: *i provoke the stranger to reveal why his or her past is so interesting*

Stranger: u tell me? lol

You: *i laugh as i find amusement in the stranger's attempt to test if i really know what i know but i am smarter than that, instead i smile and say that there must indeed be nothing*

Stranger: ok you win lol

You: *my victory over the stranger is complete. as the stranger's mind is in my grasp i begin to wonder what use if any it has to me*

You: *i quickly become uninterested and return the stranger's mind, my army is strong enough as it is, but the next one might not be as lucky*

Stranger: oh thank you

You: *as if i was never there i leave the stranger to his or her fate wishing the stranger a pleasant day*

Stranger: bye

You have disconnected.

Always wanted to do this eh?

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Stranger: horny

You: maybe

You: what are you gonna do about it?

Stranger: what are you gonna do to a horny girl

You: well i'd put on my cloak and wizard hat so i can work magic ;)

Stranger: ahah thats an interesting answer

You: then cast a level 50 fireball in her face!

You: then storm of the elder dragons

[...]

Leprechaun ghost

You: o hai!

Stranger: hai!

You: and how are you?

Stranger: very goooooooood

You: great

You: is there a special reason

You: ?

Stranger: ,:(

Stranger: do u like ghosts?

You: i think that they are interesting

Stranger: i dont like them

Stranger: i was one myself you know

You: how did you become a ghost?

Stranger: i died

Stranger: DUH

You: so why are you alive now?

Stranger: i uhh...

Stranger: i took control of somebody

You: aha

Stranger: if i want i an make them gay

You: damn, i was hoping for a hot girl

Stranger: i can be that too!

Stranger: just let me get to a place for surgery

You: nah, not the same thing

Stranger: ...

Stranger: u want me to be both?

You: no

Stranger: are u gay?

Stranger: dont lie to me

Stranger: I SEE ALL

You: well, i presume that if i drink enough

You: i could be

Stranger: UR GAY!?! I KNEW IT!

Stranger: dont play wit urself

You: well, most computer games require you to play with yourself

Stranger: no u play with coded enemies with AI who can blast u if their AI level is really high

Stranger: did u know im a leprachaun?

You: i thought you were a ghost

Stranger: I NEvER SAID THAT!

Stranger: what were u lookin at!?!

You: yes you did

Stranger: no i said i was a leprachaun

You: i think you're lying

Stranger: ur handsome

You: yup, definetly lying

You: :P

Stranger: nuh uh

Stranger: ur hurting my face!